Let’s face it; some people are going to take advantage of you. This is simply a fact of life. You know who these people are, and you know what? It’s your own fault! These are the people you always say yes to. Regardless of whom these individuals are, it is important to your health and sanity to learn to say no.
There is nothing wrong with saying no! In fact, there are very good reasons why you should. Below are seven excellent reasons why you should learn to say no and not feel bad about it.
Others Will Respect You
This is a big one. Respect is not given, it is earned. Do you respect your parents? If you had good parents, the answer is undeniably, yes. Why did you respect them? Was it because they gave you everything you wanted? Absolutely not! So, why should you let others push you around?
The reason you respected your parents is because of their actions. If you genuinely needed help, they would give it to you. However, if you kept asking for help doing something you were capable of, they taught you to learn to do it for yourself.
By doing things for people, you are an enabler. Doing things on our own helps us to learn responsibility and become more independent. If we agree to everything our friends or family expect us to do for them, they will keep expecting it. In the process, they lose their respect for you.
When you explain to people how you feel and that you will no longer be saying yes to everything they request, they may sulk or even become angry. This is normal, but don’t worry too much about it. They will respect you more for it and won’t use you as a crutch in the future, if you stand firm.
Learn to say no to things you know that they can handle. If a person continues to put themselves in the same situations repeatedly, let them figure it out on their own next time. It is part of being an adult. Not providing help may be the best type of help you can provide.
Users and Abusers Will Move On
Some people simply look for people they can take advantage of. This personality type will not change. In fact, you will find that when you learn to say no to them, they will often move on to other people they can use. This type of person is a combination of predators and parasite.
Either way, they are using you as a way to improve their life without any though as to how it is affecting you. They are self-centered, selfish individuals. When they no longer have you as their crutch, they will find another person to take advantage of.
Try to remember this is not your fault. This type of person will never learn to be independent and will always find someone they can leach off of. It is a sad part of life. The good news is that you will no longer be the victim.
You Will Have More Time
If you find yourself spending all of your spare time trying to help others and can’t find the time to do the things you love, learn to say no. I know it isn’t always as cut-and-dry as simply saying the words. You will need to realize that their problem is not your own and you shouldn’t treat it as if it is.
Once you are not being pulled in so many directions, you will have more time to do the things you want and need. If someone needs help, don’t be afraid to suggest someone else to ask or another solution to their problem. Learn to say no sometimes.
You don’t have to say no every single time. That is not what I am saying at all. The point is that you simply need to understand it is okay that you say no. If you have other obligations, simply state that. Don’t feel guilty about it.
You Will Have More Money
Some people ask for help with physical tasks, while others will turn to you as a source of financial support. People absolutely have to learn to support themselves and to face the consequences of bad decisions. If a person is always in need of money, offer to help them better plan their finances.
If they become offended, explain that this is not the first time they have asked for financial assistance. After all, if you bring a man a fish, he eats one night, but if you teach him how to fish, he eats for life. Supporting their bad habits is only enabling those bad habits.
Once you are no longer financially supporting others, you will have more money to invest into your savings and your family’s future. This protects yourself and your family. Money you give to people you enable is a temporary fix to a lifelong problem, unless stop financing it and help them correct it.
You Will Be Able to Focus on Things Important to You
Once you have more time and money, you will be able to do the things you have been putting off. It doesn’t matter if it is your education, a trip, or to invest more money into your retirement. If it is important to you, you will now have the means to do it.
When you are doing the things that matter to you, you will feel more fulfilled. When you learn to say no, it is possible to do this, and much more. Consider the amount of time and money you invest into helping others. What would you like to do with the time and money? Go out and do it!
You Will Be Happier and Healthier
Stress is a major reason why you should say no. According to Psychology Today, saying “no” creates balance in your life and establishes boundaries for others. Balance and boundaries are important to your mental health and overall wellness.
Saying yes to things you feel obligated or pressured into, but don’t believe in, is a waste of your time. When you learn to say no, you can devote more time, money, and energy to things that are important to you. This will help you to feel less stressed and happier. This will also lead to better physical health as well.
You Will Gain Self-Respect
The most important reason for you to say “no,” is that you will earn your own self-respect! If you feel like a pushover, you probably are. This is bad for your morale and for your mental wellness. It also affects how others feel about you.
If you have no respect for yourself, you will let others push you around. Stop doing that! Life is too short to spend time feeling as if you are worthless. When it comes to your own life, you are the only one that can put your foot down and stand up for yourself.
Don’t ever be afraid to learn to say no to those who are taking advantage of you. It can only lead to a better life for you and your family.
Learn to Say No!
Stand your ground, hold you head up high and have the courage to not back down. You and your family are worth it!
Have you finally worked up the courage and said “no!” How did it feel and what would you change? Let others know exactly what worked for you in the comments.
Thank you for reading! Stay strong and carry on, my friends!